Greetings and Salutations:
Now sum ovya might have hurd parts of my story but I is still beun axed just who is Pa Moonshine? The obvious answer is me but some folks just don't get obvious. Guest Ill just hav to spell it out fer them. Furst and mostes important I is an Okielachian so I spells stuff reeeaaallll slooowwwwww fer ya to understoods as most of yall dont talk nermal like usn Okielachains.
Like most everbody else I started out by bein born. Folks ask me when and all I can tellem is I'us too yung to member after all it was my furst day here. Then ther is alayes someone ask me why not ask yur Ma or Pa they should no. Of curse theyd no well at least Ma as i'us purty shure she was there. Kinda late to askum as they dun moved on an didn leaves no furwording address.Lets just say back then water was wetter and roks was softer. I figur I'un is at least 21 so I'us 21
I'us taught at urly age that corn was best served from a jar but ya had to be curful and noy get cot by them Revenamanurers as they thought we ot to pay Texas for making corn to liquid. Just counit grasp that concept as most folks paid us good money fur a jar of squeezuns. Onced I lurned what I needed to lurn bout makun good shine I figurd id best stay a step ahead of them Revenamanures so I gots a me a job with some side show folks and lurned how to propurly pik my nostril and that my shine tasted purty good when lit on fire. Folks is kinder strange as they paid good money to see us'n do this stuff too.
It'us in this sideshow stuff I met Ma curse she werent Ma then and well I werent Pa either. Weun started out good ceun as Ma like moonshine she figured I had to be ok. Turns out she liked the liquid more than she liked me. We did haven us a child or two whilst tugether theyus Moonshine Moonshine, CW short for Corn Whiskey, Rye, Brandy, and Mikeshardlemonade. We sorta found Mikeshardlemonade and thyus a can next to him with his name on it. Weuns dont tell Mikeshardlemonade he aint a natural moonshine as he kinda resembles me some and he fits right in.
Ma aint with us no longer she is dearly departed and I do mean dearly. Afterun she decided she liked the liquid morun she like me things didun go so well. She was a mean viscous vile and evil woman, and I am Dearly glad she is departed. Well she was born into the show, so we followed her last wishes and kept her skeleton, and it goes about with the show. Now Moonshine Moonshine kept her eyes so she culd be watchin after the family and CW inherited her pets and keeps her beloved beaver with him. Couldn afford one of those fancy earn things so once Moonshine and CW finished off a box of Golden Crisp it seemed fittun to put her ashes in it. Afterun she passed Rye, Brandy, and Mikeshardlemonade went in difern directions whilest the other two are still tryun to get my recipe.
To sum up who is Pa Moonshine well its simple a philosopher, performer in the Irish Road Show, and of curse Patriark of The Moonshine Family Sideshow or in obvious terms I is.
Comments